Ugh, bad hair day. Yuk.
Ooh not good, you look so tired.
Girl, you need to get yourself to the gym. PDQ!
You still haven’t actioned this off the to-do list, what’s going on?!
These are things that I say to myself a few times a week – or I used to – until I started reading about how to be kinder to myself and others and become my own best friend.
And I’ve started to do just that, in fact.
Do I talk to myself more, yes absolutely – my kids think I’m nuts.
Do I still say the same things, yes. But the difference is, I wrap them up so that they come across a lot kinder.
Here’s the difference.
Ugh, bad hair day. Yuk > yes, your hair could look better, make sure you carve out some time to do it tomorrow and get a cut and colour booked.
Ooh not good, you look so tired > I look tired because of [XY or Z reason*] don’t worry, just go to bed earlier tonight.
Girl, you need to get yourself to the gym. PDQ! > it’s been a busy time lately and I have neglected my body, get up early tomorrow and do something – no excuses!
You still haven’t actioned this off the to-do list, what’s going on?! > Ok, hands up I’m procrastinating because it’s a little challenging. Don’t avoid it any more, break that darn task down into bite-sized chunks and get over those little bumps in the road as quickly as possible.
A small difference I know, but it’s helped me to feel better about things in all aspects of life.
But importantly, if you have that little chimp on your shoulder constantly bringing you down, it’s time to take action and recognise the progress you have made.
Progress? Yes, the P-word.
Progress is so important to review from time-to-time…especially if you’ve been working on overcoming a certain hurdle, a project, a life, or business goal.
But if you don’t stop to smell the roses or the fruits of your labour you won’t set yourself up for that next important milestone.
At Chorus I’m constantly reviewing the goals and objectives of our clients – and when we hit ROI targets we give ourselves a little pat on the back and then get right back to it – more than anything, we stop and focus on progress because it feels good.
But what if you don’t have anyone to tell you how well you’ve done? That’s where being your own best friend comes in and it has its huge advantages – you know yourself inside out, what makes you tick, your shortcomings, your interests and so on. Yes, you may have your own personal spat from time to time, but having your own positive personal best friend on tap should be a priority to get you to your next objective.
I still often look at myself in the mirror and think “yuk” but my own best friend says: I have my health, a roof over my head and a little old car that gets me from A to B and enables me to do some great writing, marketing and PR for my clients. Yuk can – quite frankly – get stuffed.
Focus on progress, not perfection.
*I’d like to say I’m out schmoozing but it’s often yawn-worthy mum-related stuff